A Bundle of Sweetness

(circa 1979)

Would it be a boy or a girl? It was going be a long 9 months until we found out but we were excited to meet the new addition to our family, in the middle of July, 1979. We were really hoping for a girl but knew that whichever God chose to bless us with would be exactly what we were supposed to have. And so we waited…

A DIFFERENT KIND OF PREGNANCY

This pregnancy, just like my pregnancy with Luke was so much fun and so exciting. However, instead of craving apples with peanut butter, I had an insatiable craving for grapefruit juice. There was another huge difference this time. Besides nurturing my ever-expanding tummy, dreaming about the joys of motherhood, I spent my days chasing after my very active, mischievous, boundary-testing, contrary, adorable, funny two-year old Luke. Every day he would go from closet to closet, emptying its contents while I followed after him cleaning up the mess, vainly coercing him to “help”. As frustrated as I would get, his disarmingly cute smile and quirkiness would melt my heart. But by day’s end I would fall, exhausted, into bed only to do the same thing the next day. I thought to myself, if our new child is as active and mischievous as this, I … will … die!

GETTING READY

As the blessed day drew nearer, we began to prepare. Even though we had been through childbirth classes in preparation for Luke’s birth, we did it again, just to refresh our technique. We also decided that with two children in a three-bedroom, one-bathroom, 1,100 square foot house, our days of having single sisters living with us was at an end. And so we sorrowfully bid Debbie and Stephanie goodbye as they found other living arrangements (although we still saw them in our numerous church meetings).

A CONTORTED PRETZEL

Every Friday night we went to church meetings in Anaheim, which was a 30-minute drive from our house and we would usually drive with our friends, Don & Zaida. They had a tiny two-door Karmann Ghia car and one evening I was chosen to ride in the “back seat”. Being 5’ 10” and 8 ½ months pregnant, squeezing myself into that tiny space was like curling myself into a misshapen pretzel. I did survive the trip. However, after arriving at our destination, getting out of the car out was a comedic spectacle. I unwound my contorted self, vainly trying to stay balanced with my protruding tummy while exiting the car. Any hope of graceful movement was out of the question and an audience gathered in the parking lot to watch the show. I gave them all a good laugh. Oh well, I always wanted to be a comedian. I guess this was my debut.

TRYING TO BRING ON LABOR

As I neared my due date, I began to get a little uncomfortable and really wanted to get this thing over with. We had two cars: a big Ford van and a tiny 1971 Honda 600 Sedan. The Honda had very bad shocks and riding in that little thing was like riding in a horse and buggy. So we decided to take it on a drive one evening to try to bring on labor. We were hoping that It just might work. We found a rough dirt road and drove back and forth on it, bouncing all the way. Unfortunately, it didn’t work. I was still pregnant.

IT’S A GIRL!

Finally, one evening, labor began and we were ready. Debbie came over to take care of Luke, just as we had planned. Our neighbors, Don & Rachel, came over too and as I was showing them some things I had sewn for the baby, my labor pains began to intensify. Poor Rachel was getting very nervous and pleaded with me to get going to the hospital. And so we left at about 9pm; this time, in our van. The hospital was about 30 minutes away and we had to drive through a construction zone, again, over a very bumpy road. This time, the bumpy road did its job of making my labor pains even more intensified and I was very grateful when we finally arrived at the hospital. So was a very nervous Bill.

When we got settled into my hospital room, we warned the nursing staff about my last delivery, that Luke was born with one push. And so they were ready. At about 1:00 am, just as it was time to push, they wheeled me into the delivery room. I gave it all I had … and then the doctor told me to stop pushing, right in the middle of a contraction so he could turn the baby. Whaaaat?!? Thankfully, our childbirth classes had prepared Bill, my expert coach, who brought me through that ordeal. Finally, the doctor said I could push again and out came our 9 ½ pound, 22 inch, baby GIRL! Nothing could have been more beautiful! As the nurse handed her to me, I breathed a prayer of thanksgiving for this sweet gift from God. Her name would be Shannon Marcia.

OUR BUNDLE OF SWEETNESS

A girl! Just what we wanted! Luke now had a little sister to take care of (or terrorize, as the case may be?) and I had a little girl that I could dress up in pink and ruffles and bows, just like a doll. This was going to be so much fun!

Our family was now complete and it was time to get to know this sweet, new addition. She was not at all like her big brother. Rather than fighting sleep, she enjoyed it and rarely cried when we laid her in her crib. And when she woke up she was usually happy and patiently waited until we lifted her out of her crib.

One day I had put her down for a nap and took a few moments to rest in our recliner (a rare occurrence for me). After a while I asked Luke to check on his sister to see if she was awake yet. He came back, announcing, “Yep! Her eyes is up.”

One morning I went into Shannon’s room to pick her up after a good night’s sleep. She was lying in her crib, smiling contentedly. However, I noticed some blood and pus on her sheet. Then I looked at her ear, which was crusted with the same. Apparently she had had an ear infection and it had burst during the night. She never cried or even fussed. This was one contented child! (And her ear healed just fine.)

A few months later Shannon was able to sit up on her own. One evening as I was making dinner, she was sitting on the kitchen floor, playing with some Tupperware and measuring cups that I had given her. As I looked down at her and she looked up at me, our eyes met and she gave me the sweetest little smile. I thought to myself, “I need to capture this precious moment forever in my heart. I don’t ever want to forget it.” And I never have forgotten it. I think it was a defining moment of our ensuing lifetime relationship.

GOD DOES KNOW BEST

Yes, there certainly was enough room in our hearts to love two children – with two very different personalities and two different ways of relating (and disciplining too), but loving each one just as much as the other.

How foolish we had been, not wanting to have children! How grateful we are that God knew better and worked so hard in our hearts to make us willing – even yearning to have children. God knew much better than we did what would be best for us. Had we followed our own preference, I shudder to think what we would have missed out on. Instead of growing old and lonely with just the two of us, we are now blessed with not only a son and daughter, but also a wonderful daughter-in-law and son-in-law and three sweet grandchildren. And the lifelong friends we’ve made along the way because of our children have been priceless! When God blesses, he multiplies.

And, even more importantly, how tragic it would have been to miss out on our many experiences of God if we had had our way. Yes, parenting is the hardest job ever. It taxes every amount of energy you have, every ounce of patience, every bit of wisdom (and a whole lot of money) and you come to the realization that YOU…CAN’T…DO…IT! And that is what it’s all about. From the very beginning of parenthood, I realized that I needed the Lord. In desperation, I would turn to him and he became everything that I needed. He became my energy, my patience, my wisdom. And isn’t that what my purpose in life is all about? Without God permeating my being, I’m just an empty shell but all the difficulties of life are my opportunity to gain him.

Through the years God has proven over and over that he really does know best. Sometimes I fight against him but my prayer is that, in spite of me, he will get his way. I’m so glad he’s stronger than I am and so much wiser. I wouldn’t trade my choices for his for anything!