The More, The Merrier

(Part 1)

(Circa 1972-1973)

As I mentioned previously, one huge component of our church life culture was “Corporate Living”. There were brothers’ houses and sisters’ houses, where the single “brothers” or “sisters” would live together and many, many times, the single “saints”, or even couples would live with another couple or family. That idea was very appealing to us – we wanted God to use us and our home in whatever way he wanted. And boy, did he take us up on the offer!

A Couple from Ghana

So, not too long after we moved to Los Angeles, there was a couple (Ransford & Johanna) from Ghana that had just gotten married and needed a place to stay before they returned home to Ghana. This was our first experience of corporate living (and definitely NOT the last). It was wonderful!

The fellowship together was so sweet and taking care of them was so much fun, although their appetite for ice cream was insatiable. Every time I went shopping, I would buy more ice cream, thinking it would last for a long time. But alas, whenever I checked our supply, it had been depleted and I would have to buy more.

Our time together was filled with wonderful fellowship about Jesus and stories about their life growing up in Ghana and its culture. And being newlyweds, they had fun together. We had a large, beautiful gold-flecked mirror hanging on our living room wall. One day while we were at work, they had been dancing around the living room and Johanna accidentally kicked off her shoe, which hit the mirror and broke it. When we came home from work that day, I’ll never forget the miserable look on their faces. They felt so bad and apologized over and over and over for the mishap. We just laughed, reassured them and decided we could have the mirror cut in two. Turns out, having two smaller mirrors was much better than having one big mirror.

An Unforgettable African Meal

In the church, not only was there the couple from Ghana but there were also some brothers from Kenya and Nigeria. So Johanna decided to make an authentic West African meal for them. That was an adventure. The meal consisted of peanut butter soup, fufu, chicken stew and kenkey. The peanut butter soup was surprisingly good (I admit I had some misgivings before savoring my first bite). The apartment did smell of peanut butter for two days afterward, but I can think of worse things to smell. Fufu is a starchy mixture on the order of mashed potatoes, but is much stiffer. Fufu is used as a “spoon” of sorts, to scoop up the soup to eat, with your fingers. It was very good. The chicken stew was good too. However, the kenkey … Its main ingredient is masa flour made into a dough. It is wrapped in foil, steamed and set in a warm area for a few days to ferment.

My normally cast iron stomach met its match with kenkey. When I took my first bite, I could feel it travel every inch down my esophagus, and hit my stomach, where it bounced a few times – and … just … stayed there … for a very … long … time. A while later I felt the kenkey rising back up the way it came and I tried to smile politely to mask my discomfort. Thankfully, the kenkey did eventually go back down. On the other hand, the African brothers voraciously ate every bit of the delicacy.

A Tearful Goodbye

After five weeks of living together our hearts had been knit with Ransford & Johanna and when the inevitable goodbyes had to be said, part of our hearts left on that plane with them and landed in Ghana. Little did we know the hardships they would eventually face a few years after they returned.

They began their new life together in Accra (the capitol city) and started their family, having three little boys. Then some political unrest in the country began and escalated until it became a coup. There were shortages of everything, especially food. One day Ransford went out to try to find some food for his family and after an entire day, came home with only one gallon of water. Hearing their children’s hungry cries must have torn their anguished hearts apart. Through it all, however, by God’s loving care, they survived and even flourished. They raised 3 wonderful boys and established a thriving church. Several years later when they came back to the United States for a visit, we met their sweet boys who, not surprisingly, had this insatiable appetite for … ice cream.

Our North Hollywood Family

When we moved to North Hollywood in 1973, we excitedly welcomed Maria & Collette into our family. It was, for the most part, a sweet experience. We all got settled in and established new routines and household duties. Maria even got a job at Capitol Records where I worked so we drove to and from work together every day. We had such a marvelous time, singing and fellowshipping together.

Collette, on the other hand, wasn’t such a happy person. One day she got really angry with me (I can’t remember why). She lashed out at me and shouted, “You’re such a phony!” I had never had anyone say anything like that to me before and I was crushed. So I went to the Lord about it, “Lord, am I a phony? I don’t want to be – I really want to be genuine.” The only answer I remember hearing was “Well, at least you’re a genuine phony.” Huh…? Was God trying to teach me something? Was he trying to expose that dark part of my heart? Yes, and he used Collette to shine the light so I could deal with it.

Maria & Collette didn’t live with us for very long before Maria left us to get married. We were so happy for her but we missed her too. So when Maria moved out, Collette moved out too.

Not too long after, two brothers moved in: Stan & Joe. Now that was a totally different experience, having brothers. It was kind of wild. Stan was a big guy, with a football player kind of build – and a great sense of humor. Joe, on the other hand, was tall and thin with a basketball player kind of build, and equally as funny. Those two kept us laughing.

One day, Bill and I were relaxing in the living room when we heard some loud banging and crashing from Stan & Joe’s bedroom. We rushed in to see what all the ruckus was about. After noticing footprints halfway up their wall, we were informed that they had just been playing an innocent game of tackle basketball. (What on earth is tackle basketball? It must have been their own, unique invention.) I think that Joe came out the loser, as we found him sprawled out on the bed, panting – but at least there was no blood.

A few weeks later, Bryson and Tom moved in. So our family grew from 4 to 6. Our house was a hub of activity; never a dull moment. And with each change of family members came a new set of issues and personality quirks to deal with.

One day it was Bryson’s turn to clean the bathroom. After a few minutes he came out, proudly announcing that he was finished. I thought, “That certainly didn’t take long.” So after going into the bathroom to inspect it, I asked him, “Bryson, did you clean the bathtub?” “No,” he replied. I instructed him to go back in and clean the bathtub. When he was finished, I went in for another inspection. “Bryson, did you clean the toilet or the floor or the mirror?” “No,” he replied. My patience was wearing very thin by this time. “Bryson, what DID you clean?” “Ummm, the sink and the bathtub” was his reply.

Now, shouldn’t a young adult know that … there … is … more … to … a … bathroom … than … a … SINK and … BATHTUB? I always thought of myself as a patient person but I felt my face turning bright red and my patient demeanor was GONE! I was ready to explode! And there it was: a beam of God’s light shining into that dark corner, exposing some impatience in my heart. Clearly, God was using Bryson. (But I still made him go back into the bathroom to finish the job.)

Turning On the Light

God uses many things to turn on the light to shine into the dark corners of our heart. One of those things is the people that surround us. Marriage is especially good for that purpose and so are the people we work with and people we worship with. We have no choice but to consistently be with them, no matter what their personality is like or how different they are from us. We need to look to Jesus for his grace to love, respect and value them, regardless of how we feel.

For this next stage in our life, however, God was going to use corporate living to shine that light. And so, for the next seven years, we opened our home and heart to many single brothers and sisters. (I think I’ve counted about 30 but there might be more.)

We thought that God could use us to help single young adults grow and mature in their faith – and maybe we did help them. But God certainly used each of them in special, unique ways to teach us something, encourage us, reveal something in our hearts or simply make us laugh. God is like that. He doesn’t waste anything – and loves to use every experience to shine his light into the dark corners of our life.